First bump in the road

Good day readers. It’s a funny way to start a blog post, but what the hell, I’m doing it anyway. So according to my last blog post I stated that I would give an update on our argument or disagreement yesterday already, but things didn’t work out like they were supposed to, so here I am today. Sorry for the wait.
First things first I just want to clarify that we didn’t actually have a verbal spat or anything close to that. I just felt disappointed and decided to keep my feelings to myself. My wife did notice that my mood has changed and kept asking “What’s the matter?”  but I gave nothing away, stating that I was okay the entire time until we later got home and friends of hers came over so I had to act friendly and happy in front of our guests. As soon as her friends left (newlywed couple as well, I was forced to make nice with the guy even though I didn’t want to, but more on that in future blog posts) I forgot all about the problem and we went back to be a loving couple.
Okay so Lakendary, what did you feel disappointed about? Well, it was money. BIG SURPRISE. I know. A little bit of history first. The thing is this, my wife’s employers decided to give her money as a wedding gift. This was a big sum of money, almost as much as my monthly salary. The money has obviously been paid into her bank account so she is kind of in control of this money.
We’ve discussed what we should spend this money on. She sort of wants something tangible, something she can see and point out like, there, this is what my bosses gave us as a wedding present. I suggested that we can settle all of our short-term debts and live a little more comfortably from month to month, even save a little. We soon came to a compromise and said we would spend half the money on settling debt and the other half on something tangible.
My wife’s first choice was nice outside furniture. We have this big courtyard that’s looking a bit empty. We had a look around and came up with a couple of options. We discussed our options with our mothers and they both thought that we were being outlandish. We shouldn’t spend that much money on outside furniture. Rather get the cheap plastic stuff. I mean we are just starting out. It’s all a bit too much too soon. Fair enough. So we were convinced that we are going for the cheap plastic furniture (but not too cheap that it breaks quickly) and other small things around the house. I still have my microwave from college but my wife thinks it’s old and ugly. We should replace that. Cool. I think we need a DVR cause sometimes all the good shows play at times when we aren’t home or awake. Cool.
Back to the day in question. My wife and I went shopping for the furniture and the microwave (and maybe a digital camera because we realized on our honeymoon that camera phone photos aren’t all that great). As soon as we identified which outside furniture we were going to get my wife kind of got tired of being in the mall or something because after we got back from the ATM she said we should leave the other things for another day. I got the feeling that she didn’t want to spend the money. We were at the stores. If we wanted a microwave, why not get it now?
I felt helpless. I felt like she had all the control over the money. She got her furniture and I didn’t get any cool gadgets like the camera or a DVR. So in my mind, I made up my mind that the rest of that money it’s hers. Even though the money is supposed to be for us, our wedding gift, it was paid over to her into her bank account. And if there are any gadgets or cool electronics that I want, I was going to have to save up for it myself and get it myself without any assistance from my wife.
At the wedding, in my dad’s speech he mentioned that I was money savvy and that when he gave my sister and me money to go spend at a particular place, I would always come back with some money while my sister wouldn’t. Even when we planned the wedding, I was always the one looking at the budget, getting upset that we are blowing the budget. So my wife knows I very budget conscious. She also sticks to a budget but not as much as I do. So when we were discussing how we would be handling our money, we agreed that there are certain expenses I pay and certain expenses she pays and after that we spend the money as we please.
Right now I almost have no money left. She still has a big chunk of her salary left from last month, the wedding money we got, her Christmas bonus and she just received her salary for this month as well (a couple of weeks early). I feel poor while my wife is rolling in the dough. I have too much pride to ask her for money. I don’t want my ego to get in the way but I really feel helpless at this point. I won’t say a thing, which is probably the wrong thing to do, but that’s just me though. I don’t think my stubbornness would ever change.
So what is my plan? I am not too sure. I am just going to keep track of my money like I always have. Maybe even be a little tighter. Stop going out, stop paying for take-out and hopefully have a healthy bank balance to buy a PS4, fuck the DVR. I’m going big.
PS. I passed my first year of studies. One year down, two to go. I can’t wait to start my career in computer science rather than finance.
Until next time. Thanks for reading.


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